Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

What is Mother’s Day?  Is it a day for Hallmark and the flower industry?  Or perhaps it’s a single day we stop to say, “Hey Mom, I love you and appreciate what you have done for me.”  A day when I acknowledge, “You were not perfect but you did the best you could, with the tools you had at the time.”

Thinking about my own mothering of my children, I know now, I could have been a better mother. I could have given them more time but I had to meet the needs of the entire family, their father and sometimes my own needs.

At one point, I started going back to college when my children were in school.  I was graduating with my Bachelors Degree when my oldest graduated from High School and I received my Master’s degree when my youngest graduated from High School.  This educational task took time from them but I hope it gave them hope that they could accomplish anything on their own time and to never give up.

My own mother, now 88 years old, is my hope for the future.  She is engaged in life, is never home, manages her own finances, drives her younger friends around a major city, house sits for me when I go out of town, and loves the company of her cat that I adopted for her this past Christmas.

We humans (mother’s) are not perfect but we can learn from the past, do our best and hope for the future.  We can model “never give up” – we can model “take care of yourself” and most of all we can always say, “I love you unconditionally!”

Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers who strive to always do your best.  May the love you give be returned to you and may the love we all have for all children lead to peace all over the world.

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

Days are darker and shorter, the weather is cold or wet, and yes, it is winter.  The holidays have come and gone and you find yourself feeling sad, tired and depleted.  This is somewhat normal for many of us and even more so for the older population.  They might have had lots of activity during November and December and now feel let down by the lack of stimulation and the inability to get outdoors.

 Often, once you get back to your normal activities after the holidays this temporary “blues” feeling usually goes away.  However, some individuals have enough symptoms to be diagnosed with “Seasonal Affective Disorder” (SAD).  This real illness is characterized by extreme lethargy and depression as well as some of the depressive symptoms like increased appetite, weight gain and difficulty concentrating.  Sometimes those with SAD require medication and help should be sought from a physician.  Talk therapy can also help during this time by giving one some strategies to deal with and overcome the symptoms.

 How to beat the “Winter Blues”:

 1)    Exercise releases endorphins which improves mood.  So, move – even if it is just doing a morning stretch with a television guide.  If you can, take a short 30-minute walk every day.  It might be all you need.

2)    Stay clear of sweets and carbohydrate rich foods.  Avoid alcohol because it is a depressant.  Look for low fat protein snacks and meals.

3)    Vitamin D is helpful.  In the summer you might get all the vitamin D you need by being in the sun but in the winter you might need to boost your intake.  Talk to your doctor about how much to take.

4)    Try to expose yourself to sun light when it comes out.  However, there are lights you can buy that have a similar effect as the sun. 

 The most important information is that Spring will come.  You do not need to suffer.  Seek a professional who can guide you to feeling better.  This is a very common but not welcome cycle for many individuals.

 Eldercare Services has several Care Managers on staff that are licensed therapists. Give us a call toll free at 866 760-1808 if we can help you in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

An individual with a dementia can be easily overwhelmed by all of the activities of holiday celebrations and become overly anxious, depressed or more confused.

 Most individuals with dementia do relatively well with set routines and naturally pull back from extra activities that might tax their memory or set them up for failure.  Sometimes a refusal of an invitation that was previously enjoyed can be an early “red flag” for families that something is changing in their elder family member’s cognition.

 A few tips to keep the holidays enjoyable:

 1) Set up one holiday decoration in your family member’s home as a family activity.  Don’t mention that you are doing it because he or she can’t.

2) Tell him or her not to worry about gifts, you will assist them in finding gift cards – give an excuse that the kids like to shop for themselves or it is so challenging to find the right sizes.   Help him or her sign cards and stuff the gift cards into them. Do some of your cards at the same time.

3) Family gatherings can overwhelm and loud noise can increase agitation and anxiety.   So, if you are bringing mom or dad over for a holiday meal – pick them up just before and return him or her right after dessert.  However, if he or she is enjoying the company of little ones, play it by observation – the key is be aware of their behavior.

4) Your holiday gifts might include a phone that is easy to use, sweatsuits that are easy to dress in, and maybe a “housekeeper” once a week that really is a caregiver that can expand her time to do more as mom or dad needs more help.

5) Reduce alcohol use or eliminate it from your celebrations – alcohol only complicates and endangers those with dementias.

6) Try to reduce the sugar laden treats as well – it is easy to be over expose to the treats of the season.  Have lots of fresh fruits available.