Even if we can’t remember the details, we can use our early experiences, our memories, to bring back smiles, laughter or tears. Nevertheless, these early memories are what make us who we are today.
Some of us have only positive memories of our childhood, while others may have a tough time due to our unique circumstances of family or health, making our memories mostly negative.
I have known so many people that took those early negative experiences and made them a catalyst to do better than their parents were able to do, who actually took wonderful paths in life – which have led to careers that have enriched society. Likewise, those that have good memories can fondly recollect stories of joy and sadness, because no life is without stress or some loss.
The photo is of me, with my cousin, Arlene, at the age of four. We are sitting in our grandmother’s backyard looking at a book – I’m the more serious one. Arlene was always smiling and she was my very good friend throughout our growing up years. I smile thinking of her and girl scouts and paper dolls. She died very early in her life and unfortunately she never really found her calling. But, I remember her as adding to my life and I will always take a part of her on my journey – because I am sure she added to my personality in ways unknown to me.
If you are stuck with negative memories of early years, you may want to work with a therapist on “forgiving” not forgetting, so these old hurts don’t burden you and prevent you from the joy in living. Holding grudges and anger does affect your entire system – so give yourself some room to enjoy life – “don’t harbor anger or resentment” – work it out. Don’t stumble on your memories – instead use them as building blocks for a more joyful life.
Ask your physician for some names of therapists in your area, or we have six licensed counselors on our staff of Eldercare Services that could assist you.