My Aunt Frances turned 100 this past January. She is the eldest of four girls, including my mom, who all predeceased her. A fun topic of discussion in my family is about the fact that she took her social security early, at 62, not knowing if she would live to the age of 65! She made that and then some.
One of the things that has kept her going all of these years, besides children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, is the love of the piano. She majored in music at her alma mater, giving a senior recital at graduation, and has continued to play since then. She still plays regularly at church services and is the pianist at the town’s senior center. I asked her what had helped her keep mentally fit and she attributed this to the continued piano playing.
Her latest performance occurred three days after she turned 100 when she gave a piano recital at her church. During that same week, she was interviewed by the state newspaper and a local radio station. Of course, the repeating question asked was: “What would be your advice to others as to how to live a good, long life?” Her response: “Set a goal in mind. Continue to work at it; never give up. It takes discipline, time, and work but if you do this, you will do better in everything you try.”
In thinking about this, it seems to me that it has not only been my aunt’s devotion to an interest and a goal, but the social context in which this has taken place. Her life interest has been one which not only has been of benefit to her, but one which has allowed connection to other individuals and to the entire community. It seems to reinforce a crucial need of seniors: to feel that they are still of value, continuing to play a vital role, not just waiting to die. That, I think, was what Erik Erikson was referring to in his concept of the final stage of human development: Ego Integrity vs. Despair.
Aunt Frances is a role model for me, and for anyone facing getting older. Finding what you love in life, and letting that interest connect you to others outside yourself as much as possible, can enrich not only your own life, but the lives of all those around you as well.