Care Management

“I didn’t think my family would be an elder care family!”

Posted in adult children, Blog, Care Management, Relationships on May 3, 2013

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

I heard this statement from one of our long time employees and remembered my recent journey as a caregiver daughter. I thought, every family caring for an aging family member is an “Eldercare” family because we are all faced with challenges not expected with the expansive decisions from medical to housing. The other issue that warrants some intervention is that most of us have other family members that have different views on what should and shouldn’t be done for mom or dad and, without a third party who is objective, it is hard to come to a solution.

We also don’t always share the care equally which might place a burden on one family member either by default or choice.

Everyone starting on the “Eldercare” path would benefit from a consultation with a Professional Care Manager but most of us think we know everything our parents need and it seems that it’s not until there is a conflict or a crisis without a solution that we call in the experts – I think it is just human nature and don’t fault any of us.

However, as supportive of a family you think you have, being an Eldercare Family is the good news – I know my good caregiving journey was positive because of “expert” peers in the office. Getting advice, having a sounding board and supporting my siblings came from my fellow team members – I am glad I had a place to guide me because I was blinded by my own history and needed the wisdom of objectivity.

Aging Families: Dilemmas, Concerns and Solutions

Posted in adult children, Age Related Issues, Alzheimer's, Blog, Care Management, Caregiving, Dementia and Memory Loss, home care, Relationships on April 19, 2013

Working adults in the “autumn” of their careers find that they are juggling work and aging family dilemmas — causing loss of pay or employer dissatisfaction with their performance or absence. Baby Boomers facing retirement also face the realities of still having to care for parents or other older relatives — this “care” duty can detour their dreams of the envisioned “retirement”.

Linda will talk about major issues facing families locally or at a distance. She will give Rotarians a list of resources to help them navigate the maze of resources available in order to find help that will respect the dignity of the elder and bring peace to the adult child. Linda will also talk about the realities of living longer lives and statistics that will affect all of us as we age.

Linda Fodrini-Johnson is a Licensed Family Therapist and a certified, Professional Care Manager. She founded Eldercare Services in 1989 — the first full service Geriatric Care Management and Home Care company in the East Bay. She has been guiding, coaching and counseling families in the Bay Area for 30 years. Linda is the recent past President of the National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers (NAPGCM).

The Elephant in the Room – Difficult Talks We All Should Have

Posted in adult children, Age Related Issues, Blog, Care Management, Caregiving, Dementia and Memory Loss, End of Life, home care, Mental Health, Moving an Aging Adult, Relationships on April 19, 2013

Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC, Founder and Executive Director of Eldercare Services discusses and give solutions on effective communication with family members about the issues of aging.

These issues might be:

Who would make medical decisions for you? And, do they know your wishes?
Remarriage
Memory loss — possible dementia
Forgiveness — Needing it and granting it
Moving
Can someone take over your financial affairs?
How do I face not driving?
Who inherits what of my possessions and assets?

Mom is Gone

Posted in adult children, Age Related Issues, Blog, Care Management, Caregiving, Dementia and Memory Loss, End of Life, Relationships on January 31, 2013

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

You know the time will come. You have been through many big and small health care dilemmas. You have prepared for her final care and found caring and loving people to be with her. You wish you could have done more but know you did your best with the information and support of professionals and family. Yet, when the time comes, it still hits your heart and soul like having the wind knocked out of you.

“This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24. I can’t tell you why this scripture rings in me when I feel so much loss. But, it is a glorious sunny January day and though it began with her leaving, I think this Psalm is mom telling me, “I am at peace, dear family. Be glad in your life, rejoice with one another for I will always be part of each of you.” “Smile, joke, be positive and find the bright light in every day.”

We have been gifted by a mother who lit the way and guided each of her four children to be themselves, honor family, honor God and care for others. She has imprinted her hand on the hearts of us all.

So, the Academy Award and the Nobel Peace Medal for “Wonderful Mother” goes to Bernice Bidwell born on April 8, 1922 in San Francisco and died at peace, on January 30, 2013 in Walnut Creek.

Diagnosed with a Progressive Illness – Now What?

Posted in Blog, Care Management, Caregiving, Relationships on January 11, 2013

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

I had the honor of speaking to a group of individuals with Parkinson’s, as well as those who are caring for someone with this disease, this past week and I came away thinking about how much support these families need immediately after the diagnosis.

It is only natural to let emotions flood our mind when we get such news and it makes it hard for the patient or the care partner to truly take in what the physician is trying to tell us about the next step. We are somewhat “blown away” and either we are feeling great fear, we are in denial or thinking about the dreams we had for our lives.

And yes, there needs to be hope for a new treatment or a cure (if available).

Once this news sets in, we seem to go to a place of – what do I do next? And, what should we do to plan for our future.

This is the time I would encourage all individuals with a progressive illness diagnosis to meet with a Professional Geriatric Care Manager, even if they are not yet seniors. To look at options that will meet their needs and keep their values at the center of all planning. From this initial meeting, individuals will be well-informed when they meet with their financial planners, insurance professionals and estate planning attorneys – because now they will know what they want and the cost of those options.

There are many proactive lifestyle changes individuals and the partners can make to live life fully once they have done their planning for the “what ifs” of an unknown future.

All along this journey, both the individual with the illness and their care partner will need emotional support – so, find a support group early in the process. Support groups are wonderful settings to share how new treatments or approaches are working and will give us all hope and most of all “understanding”.

Mothers’ Gifts for all Seasons

Posted in adult children, Age Related Issues, Blog, Care Management, Caregiving, Dementia and Memory Loss, Holidays, Relationships on December 21, 2012

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

I am posting this picture of my mother for all of you to know that the end of life can be filled with dignity. Yes, she is in the very last phase of her life and on hospice but she has quality, despite her deficits.

Our mothers gave us life by birth or love and sometimes both. At this season of giving, I am so thankful for the gift of a loving mother who never put me down and always encouraged me to just do my best, to love God, country and family.

I am fortunate to have taken a professional path that enabled me to secure the very best at the end of life for my mother (and many of your parents as well). Seeing her smile lights my heart and will stay with me all the days of my life.

To paraphrase a line in a song, “fathers be good to your daughters, they will grow up to be mothers”. Love is what nurtures us all – love those close to you, respect them for who they are with all their imperfections – because we are all imperfect but love is not.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

“Soul connecting” – the honor of my work!

Posted in Blog, Care Management, Relationships on October 26, 2012

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

Since I am the Executive Director of Eldercare Services, I do get to meet with a few families from time to time, mostly the adult children of aging parents. I have two older clients I have worked with for many years but I just don’t get the opportunity to meet many other older adults at this time in my career.

Today, I went to see an 89 year old client and was so touched by his history, his strength and wisdom that I just feel blessed by the work I do. This work allows me the opportunity to communicate, not only cognitively but, with the soul and heart. Of course, I was keeping professional boundaries however, hearing the story of a life with my heart and not just looking for past strengths for which to base my recommendations.

It was not the concrete fixing of a problem, it was listening and responding from the heart – hearing the truth from a deep place of the soul. It is so important for us all to listen to the wisdom of the elders in our community or family. Their life trials, successes and adventures have many a lesson for each of us.

I thank all who have contributed to a better world and encourage everyone to listen for those life stories of “strength” from the elders in their communities.

A Poem by a Fallen Colleague – Wisdom of the Woods by Debra Levy

Posted in Blog, Care Management, Relationships on October 19, 2012

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

The poem below was written by one of my National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Manager (NAPGCM) friends, Debra Levy, who died this past weekend from a Brain Tumor at age 59 – a very quick passing from diagnosis to death! She was on the National Board with me, a contributor to the Public Relations committee and editor of the Inside GCM and GCM Journal. She was an excellent professional who is going to be missed by her colleagues all over the country.

~~ Wisdom of the Woods, by Debra Levy ~~

The old ones surround us like tree trunks
Strong regal oaks, weeping willows
Gnarled scrubby pines

And like leaves on a tree, we shelter them
Broadly stretching our limbs
offering energy and nourishment

The aging and wrinkled pillars
Give us roots
Our tenacious elders remind us that we perch
Sometimes steadily, sometimes falteringly
On the shoulders of past generations

Their many furrowed layers
Like intricate folktales
Reveal secret stores of strength
Resiliency, ferocity
Surprising tenderness

We outstretched leaves are of varied hues
Some are local saplings
Some are kin
Some have traveled from far-off lands
To tend these ancient souls

We struggle mightily
To keep the forest standing
And we grieve
When our beloved trees fall

The only thing that is certain
Is the future
As seasons change
We will soon take the place of the old trees
Dependent on the kindness of others

Aging Experts

Posted in Blog, Care Management on October 16, 2012

Founder and Executive Director Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

After watching a home repair program about fixing the messes that non-expert contractors (and I would guess not licensed) cause homeowners great headaches and expense, I could only think about families who hear, “We do free Care Management” and think they are receiving expert guidance. I guess you get what you pay for!

Professional Care Managers who belong to the National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers (NAPGCM) and whom are certified as Care Managers are experts and they have fees that represent the years of experience, education and supervision you would expect to see in any profession. They usually bill by the hour or fraction of.

When you trust a non-expert to guide you, it could cost you dollars and time but, most important, quality of life could be compromised when you don’t have a professional advocate.

I encourage you to hire experts to not only build your fences and fix your plumbing but to write legal documents, guide you in making challenging decisions or find care for an aging family member.

100 Year Old Driver Injures 14 – What Can Families Do?

Posted in adult children, Age Related Issues, Blog, Care Management, Driving, Relationships on August 30, 2012

Founder and Executive Director, Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC

I just read the story of the 100 year old driver injuring 14 people on August 30, 2012 in Los Angeles. Driving at later ages is a concern for families and communities. What can families do? What should families or friends do when they suspect that cognition or physical frailty is impairing an elder’s ability to drive?

Just taking the keys away is not enough and sometimes not legal – but families try this and often fail because elders, despite a dementia, call a car repair and have new keys made. Even when cars are taken, the creative yet impaired elder can call a car dealer and have a new car delivered!

Professional Geriatric Care Managers help families with these difficult decisions and come up with creative, respectful ways in which to remove unsafe drivers from our communities. They will also help elders who are unfairly being requested to stop driving only because of their age – not their abilities. We all have rights but, when we are impaired, we don’t have the ability to make sound decisions and families struggle with these tough conversations.

Reporting a driver to the DMV is a first step but it might not be as expedient as being creative and protecting others, as well as the older frail driver.

If you live in the San Francisco Bay Area, Eldercare Services has more than 17 Professional Geriatric Care Managers to guide you through this challenging process. Families living outside of the area can find a care manager at www.memberfinder.caremanager.org.

Read the news story here.